Sunday, May 23, 2010

Sav and Stav shed some weight

Once upon a time, Sav had a dream that school was her passion and, after awaking, she decided she must go back. She searched near and she searched far for the perfect opportunity, and when she found it, she and Stav packed their bags and headed south to a mystical land called "Florida"...

I am quite openly a Type B personality. I like a little chaos. I like messy creativeness and artsy appearances. My organizational skill set is still being honed, but as far as most Type Bs go, I feel I do have the coping mechanisms to fit into and succeed in the "real world."

In fact, I just took an online quiz which confirmed that I am Type B, but that I have my life together. That's good.

Brian is a Type A kind of guy. If he doesn't know what he's doing all day when he wakes up in the morning, it can be stressful. If I call at 5:30 and say, "Hey, want to meet friends for drinks at 7?" he almost certainly will say no. He needs time to process, to fit it into his schedule. He likes minimalist style, sleek lines, and solid colors. However, he is okay with a little artistic madness, and he (unlike most Type As) believes in expressing his feelings. I love all of these things about him.

Typically, my Type Bish attitude goes well with his Type Aish attitude, but this move is proving our Types quite well.

While I'm pretty organized (I've been packed, with boxes labeled and numbered, for 2 weeks), I'm very carefree about the whole thing. I don't want to spend a lot of money, so I put up all my cumbersome items on Craigslist and sold them. I now own but one bookshelf, which, if it cannot be broken down, will also end up on CL. I do not own a bed, nor a desk, nor a bike. I gave away over half of my clothes. I actually got receipts for all of my donations and will be writing them off next year (so against my Type B typical ignorance of tax exemptions. However, I have yet to file these important items.. hmm).

Brian is- well, he's trying. He did sell his bike. And two of his guitars, and his amp. He's doing well- but he does want to keep his books and his desk and almost all of his clothes. He's going to take 2 trips in the car to FL to get all of his belongings there. I will squeeze in my stuff and most of our "joint" items in one car trip down.

I am feeling good about this. It was hard to sell my beloved baker's rack, but $20 cash in my hands somehow made me so happy! It was rough to give away clothes instead of wearing them until they were destroyed, but I got to give them to flood victims AND write it off my taxes! Plus, all of my clothes now fit in TWO suitcases. I'm thrilled at feeling simplified.

This is almost a relaxing situation for me, Type B. I get to go to a new place and start over. I get to bring only the things I really love and be with the person I love and begin again. I get to go thrifting to buy lamps and silverware and desks. The prospects are so exciting.

Type A Brian is finding this whole thing very stressful. Granted, he is also pressured with finding a new job- but he worries about what we'll sleep on, and where we'll go and who we'll see and everything else.

But both of us, Type A and B, are appreciative of this chance to have an adventure together. It's definitely the most romantic thing we've ever done together. We're giving up jobs and lives and friends and moving together. More than that, he's giving up his life and friends and going with me.

True to my Type, I'm now headed to the first of many going-away parties and putting off my cleaning and other things that must be accomplished until later. Happy Sunday to all.

Saturday, May 15, 2010

Sav and Stav do some growing up

Sav never really believed that after the princess met her prince, the two lived happily ever after.. But since no one ever wrote that part of the story, she and Stav are playing the "ever after" by ear.

Like most mothers do, Mom told me that if I didn't have anything nice to say, I shouldn't say anything at all. So I've been quiet.

Tonight, however, I had one of those rare moments of break-through. My friend Ashley and I were chatting over our home-made "Clean-out-the-cupboard one-dish-wonder" (which, if you're wondering, consisted of onions, barley, carrots, and edamame). She mentioned something that reminded me of a philosophy that has pulled me out of a slump before: I am not the victim. I cannot allow myself to feel victimized. I must be a champion for my relentless happiness; I must be my own heroine.

In the wake of a series of uncontrollable events, this advice must be heeded or I'm bound to spiral into the abyss.

With that newly re-acquired mentality, I'm suddenly feeling very empowered to take on this time of transition. Yes, it's true that I am going to move 3 times in the next 2 months. Yes, it's true that I'm going to be unemployed for some amount of time. It's also true that I am taking my wonderful, loving, self-sacrificing boyfriend to a town neither of us has ever even visited and asking him to make a life and a career there. And suddenly, all of this is seeming very exciting.

Stav and I started dating very young. We were silly and irresponsible and fell fast and hard. Despite all of our giddy "love" feelings, we were aware of our inexperience. There was actually a conversation in which we decided to grow up together. We decided to discuss everything, to keep communication flowing, to feel out the possibilities and to consider the other's opinion on all subjects for the rest of our lives. There are all kinds of things that simply cannot be agreed upon, but in maintaining an open, mind we've thus far been successful in our goal to grow up together.

This move and these stressors are just another lucky break in our relationship. In the planning of this transition, as well as in the ill-timed changes of planning, we have had several break-downs and several leaps and bounds. More of both our certainly headed our way. But really, our ability to always talk things out, to lean on each other, and to go forward and grow up together is prevailing. This is the start of and entirely new phase in our relationship...

We aren't kids any more. We are steering our own lives, separately and together. We can, we must, take this momentum and keep moving forward. And we must be mindful that there are always going to be hiccups and discomfort, and there will be tragedies and deaths, disasters and fights. We have to have thick skin and we can't take things personally. We have to feel our pain and then push through it.

We have to be our own heros, for ourselves and for each other.

We have to be our own champions.

Saturday, May 1, 2010

Sav and Stav weather the storm

Sav always liked baking, especially on rainy days. But on this particular day, she was out of white flour, eggs, and butter. So naturally, she put on her Wellies and headed to the store.

Before even leaving the neighborhood, she ran into water. Lots and lots of water.


My first thought was, "Well crap, wonder what I can bake with wheat flour and applesauce, cuz that's about all I've got." And then I saw the other homes in my neighborhood: demolished. More or less, anyway. The main floors are at least 3 feet underwater; imagine what the underground basements look like.

When the sun comes out we'll get some pictures/video of this mess. Until then, enjoy this "iReport" and my mini-testimonial.